Thought

Stomach, meet butterflies.

An apology doesn't make things right. If anything, it just helps you sleep better at night. I know you meant well, but words will never change a thing. You're so selfish, you wouldn't even let me in on the coldest of nights.

Do you miss the blend of colors she left in your black and white field? Do you feel condemned just being there?

She wouldn't care if you called her and woke her up to talk at 2am. She loves arguing, and she's good at it. Scary movies make her paranoid. She hates it when people don't call her back. She envies every couple she sees walking around showing their happiness. She only wants to be lately, and lately all she's thought about is you.

You're like a hurricane to me, your center is sweet and your violence, beautiful.

He ate my heart.

I am an excitable person who only understands life lyrically, musically, in whom feelings are much stronger than reason. I am so thirsty for the marvelous that only the marvelous has power over me. Anything I can not transform into something marvelous, I let go. Reality doesn’t impress me. I only believe in intoxication, in ecstasy, and when ordinary life shackles me, I escape, one way or another. No more wall.

I understand. After all, you've lied to everyone else. I was beginning to feel left out.

Don’t you dare tell me nothing matters. Everything matters. Every fucking drop of rain, every ray of sunlight, every wisp of cloud matters and they matter because I can see them and if I can see them then they can see me and I know that there’s an entire world that cares out there, hiding behind a world that doesn’t, afraid to show who it really is and with or without you. I will drag that world out of the dirt and the blood and the muck until we live in it. Until we all live in it.

Maybe that’s just growing up. When you’re young, you tell yourself things like "Well, if it didn’t work out, it wasn’t meant to be" as if that actually meant something, just because it sounds like it does. I think you can say something like that so blithely because you expect to stumble onto something else just as wonderful just around the next bend in the road. But people are rare perfect unique things, and just because everyone really does live a life full of farewells doesn’t mean you shouldn’t at least realize what it really means to say goodbye to something that meant everything. Just because you will survive and get over it doesn’t mean you should let it go.

You absolutely destroyed me, did you know that? But you know what, I just wanna say thank you. I don't regret meeting you, but I don't wish you would magically come back into my life again because I believe God gives us someone like this for a reason. Someone who will hurt you a million times, someone who will leave you and not look back. But this person, they will make you a better person in the end. You will come out stronger than ever before and you will be happier without him than you were with him.

I hate how you sit there and act like you know me. Let's get this straight. You used to know me. And you remember what happened with that situation? See, that girl you used to know… she left. Just like you did.

You will never know how hard it is. No one will. Not amount of pain or suffering can compare to that second that I watched you walk away, and never come back.

Remember how you promised me this wouldn't change anything? Only it did. And you said that nothing could make you feel any different about me? Only it did. And that you loved me? Only you didn't, not even a little bit, not even at all. So now I'm laying in bed trying to figure out exactly why I let you win when we both knew that you were full of it. But sometimes I just wanna pretend that I'm happy and that maybe someone won't leave me. But they always do. I have been plagued by countless versions of you. Maybe I should just get used to the idea that nobody can handle me.

I want to loose myself in you.

You were my ticket out of here, and I was your dream come true. You gave me everything I ever wanted, except for you.

Every time I see something beautiful, I wish you were still here to see it with me.

Sometimes you feel everything and nothing all at once. Sometimes you’ll find yourself smiling while missing someone at the same time. At times you can absolutely love a person, all the while wanting to hate them so badly. Life comes without guarantee’s, except that smiling will brighten your face, laughing will enhance your eyes, and falling in love will change your life.